Incomprehensible Hardship

Can we ever truly understand the suffering of others? And how should we respond when people question the mercy of Allah by asking us what we would do in situations of extreme hardship?

Before all else, our path is a path of mercy, empathy, and compassion. The teachings of the path are deeply transformative and resonate with the primordial nature of humankind, but are not to be wielded as a weapon, bludgeoning the unprepared into isolation or despair. Even if you have been blessed to transcend the pain caused by inaccurate perception, your awakening is incomplete if one forgets the agony that a lack of clarity can inflict upon the soul. However enlightened we believe we are, we are but a well-directed punch away from being knocked out, a reality that we must always be conscious of and grateful for.

Theoretical circumstances are not the concern of the wayfarer. The path is deeply pragmatic, and rooted firmly in Reality. Hence, questions that begin with ‘what if…’ are rarely of any use, for they deal with the imaginary, which, by definition, the Almighty has not deemed it fit to create. His Creation is orchestrated according to His Omniscient Wisdom, and hence that which He has not created contains as much sagacity as that which He has created. Hence, questioning whether one would be able to manage the circumstances that one’s companion finds herself in is to misunderstand the nature of Reality. Each moment of existence is perfectly designed according to the needs of the person experiencing it, and therefore to attempt to understand or rationalise the experiences of another is to fondle foolishly in the dark. Should the circumstance one is analysing be imaginary (How would you react if you were diagnosed with a terminal illness?), the endeavour is entirely unnecessary, because, by His Mercy, you have not been diagnosed with the disease, and therefore can have no idea why the Almighty would do so. If the circumstance is related to another (How would you respond if your house burnt down, like hers has?), how can one know how one would respond? The particular hardship facing another is tailor-made for them, designed to expose areas of their existence that had until that point been concealed, or eradicate ties or obsessions that may be hindering their capacity to see clearly. In that way, it is only the one who experiences the pain, and not an onlooker (regardless of how enlightened she is) who can comprehend the reality of the situation. The awakened one can posit ideas, recount past experiences, or relay stories of the blessed people of old indicating how they have interpreted similar circumstances, but ultimately the teacher merely points to the moon. The wayfarer must see it for herself.

Existence is an unfathomable mystery which gradually unravels before the seeker who fine tunes her inner condition to witness His Majesty. The seeker struggles to understand herself accurately, let alone speak definitively about the experiences of others. The ultimate example of insanity is the human who attempts to manage the universe while struggling to organise his own life. The mind is an important vehicle that delivers one to the door of The Almighty. But it is a slave, not a master. The path is about tasting, not theorising. With hindsight, the most painful, devastating, and outwardly destructive episodes of my life were in fact the most fertile for spiritual awakening, and despite the agony that they inflicted, I would not exchange a single moment for all of the gold in the universe. These disasters hollowed me out, battered my ego into (temporary) submission, and rendered me at peace, safe in the knowledge that His Embrace becomes ever more gentle as the circumstances become ever more tumultuous.

When the other is faces hardship, we must embrace, support, and empathise with them. We must remind them of the Almighty’s Mercy, but without judgement or being patronising. We must be consistent in our line, but acknowledge from own experience that the surface of the recently disturbed pond takes time to return to stillness. We must love in the face of anger and hurt, which are often the consequences of painful challenges. Few are able to see the wisdom in the moment, and the awakened one is more often than not a punching bag for those who are struggling to process the events unfolding before them. Respond to the pain of others with love, gentleness, and authenticity, acting in their interests and nursing them through the spiritual surgery they are undergoing. Do not compel others to see the world as you do in a moment of agony. Patience, warmth, and understanding are the recipe, not sermons and condemnation. And verily He knows best.